Follow Me To The Deep End!!

May 18, 2015

Waco Texas Biker Gang Fight Straight Out of Sons of Anarchy But Crazier. 9 Dead. 18 Injured. About 170 Arrested. All Went Down at Twin Peaks Restaurant. Waitresses Unharmed.

twin peaks shooting
Twin Peaks Restaurant in Waco hosts massive gang fight. (photo:

The action was straight out of a Sons of Anarchy finale as a bunch of scary biker gangs convened at the Waco, TX branch of Twin Peaks Restaurant, a breastaurant specializing in buffalo wings and cleavage all served in a cozy lodge mise en scène.

Apparently the rough riding ruffians were looking for trouble and found it. Weapons used were guns, knives, chains, brass knuckles—brass knuckles???—that's an old school rumble, boy. I'm surprised a Michael Jackson impersonator singing "Beat It" wasn't in the parking lot separating the brawling bikers. You wanna stay alive, better do what you can. So beat it, just beat it! Pirouettes a la West Side Story definitely would've resulted in less bloodshed.

Scared customers and employees of the Twin Peaks franchisee hid in the restaurant's cooler. Five different biker gangs were involved. Bond was set at $1 million for each of the accused. At least 100 weapons were recovered.

Now the FBI is involved with the investigation. Latest word is that Twin Peaks corporate has revoked the Waco location's franchise stating, “We are in the people business and the safety of the employees and guests in our restaurants is priority one."

The statement continues, “Unfortunately the management team of the franchised restaurant in Waco chose to ignore the warnings and advice from both the police and our company, and did not uphold the high security standards we have in place to ensure everyone is safe at our restaurants. We will not tolerate the actions of this relatively new franchisee and are revoking their franchise agreement immediately. Our sympathies continue to be with the families of those who died and are very thankful no employees, guests, police officers or bystanders were hurt or injured.”

After the dust settled, the local cops determined there were 9 dead and 18 injured. All gang members.

Thank goodness nobody important was killed. Waitresses are all safe.

twin peaks wings
She's just fine. A friendly server at Twin Peaks Restaurant.

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Food (and Booze)! Walt Disney World to Open Jock Lindsey's Hangar Bar in the Fall. Hey, Dr. Jones, No Time For Lunch!

indy bar
Artist rendering of future Indiana Jones themed restaurant and bar.

Indy, why does the floor move?

Maybe you had one too many pisco sours.

Although there'll be no chilled monkey brains for dessert aka "Primate Parfait" or "Cristpy Coleoptera"— those fresh beetles that made my mouth water but everyone else's sealed as tight as a voodoo doll—at the Indiana Jones-themed Jock Lindsey's Hangar Bar, there will be food selections crafted more for the mainstream palate (yawn) like "Air Pirates Everything Pretzels" and "Rolling Boulder Meatballs." I'll take the extra-large, life-sized "Rolling Boulder Meatball", please.

This latest Disney eatery is named after the pilot who helps Indiana Jones escape all those angry, short-shorts wearing natives at the beginning of Raiders of the Lost Ark. It's scheduled to open this fall at Walt Disney World in Florida. (WDW always gets the cool places first!)

Now if we get a Club Obi Wan here in Anaheim, all will be forgiven. Let's make that happen!

club obi wan

May 17, 2015

New Season of Knife Fight Commemorated With a Cricket Cookie

knife fight cricket cookie
P.R. wizards' cricket cookie promotional snack for Knife Fight Season 3

Knife Fight Season 3 on Esquire Channel is kicking off. Crickets likely have something to do with the first challenge of the new season based on the cricket flour cookie I received in the mail—which I suppose is a thing nowadays, preparing us for the Armageddon with bug treats.

I was honored to play one of the judges on the premiere episode of Knife Fight Season 1 when chefs Ricardo Zarate and Octavio Becerra went clog to clog. Zarate won. (Oops, sorry, spoiler alert.) He was my vote on the show too.

Below is a clip from that episode. Be sure to tune in to Knife Fight's new season on Esquire Channel Tuesdays at 10 pm.

If you care, the cricket cookie is made by a company called bitty and is an orange ginger flavor. Personally, I think a chocolate chirp cookie would've been irresistible. That's just me. Go to for more info.